If nothing falls off of my plate, then clearly they must be balanced. I did the math. My relationship is like an iPad. Use the search tool to find content relevant to your industry. Someone has labeled them “First John,” “Second John,” “Third John,” and “Revelation.”. The kids next door challenged me to a water balloon fight. In this post I'll show you 7 killer places to find awesome content for your page. How am I supposed to be impressed by a computer winning at Jeopardy when Google usually knows what I’m looking for after 2 letters? I was s*exually harassed at work by my boss. They could have downloaded it for free!! I have difficulty sleeping at night because I lay awake obsessing over life’s mysteries, like how exactly does paper beat rock. If you’re not supposed to eat at night, why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?
Below is the list of awesome status updates for your facebook and whatsapp account, do share these with your friends to make there day a little happy and make them smile.
Sometimes I wish life was like facebook, you can delete anyone off your page and go back and delete everything you have said and done! Status, Captions & Quotes for Facebook, Whatsapp & Instagram. If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook. That’s where we come in. I didn’t give you the finger. “Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else’s expense. The 9 Types of Social Media Content You Need to Use in 2020, 22 Tips for Facebook Cover Photos: Quotes, Sizes & More, How to Use Facebook Like Ads to Grow Your Fan Page & Business, Trending content for any industry or niche, Pre-written status ideas to help you boost engagement, Popular social media images, GIF's, and memes. Everyone has an annoying friend. Do people who exercise not know about ice cream and Netflix? You can share your thoughts by using the comments feed blow. Follow the right people and you're looking at a library of content like no other! ), 22 Tips for Facebook Cover Photos: Quotes, Sizes & More. Fart when people hug you. You cannot hide your likes from Timeline on somebody else's post; you can only unlike it. No one likes a joke at someone else’s expense. I still have much to learn. Save a boyfriend for a rainy day – and another, in case it doesn’t rain. Its not because she didn’t hear you.
The slogan will be: “Viagra Rises, Niagra Falls! If people are talking behind your back, then just fart. … Now read without the word dog. Women should not have children after 35. © 2011-2020 Post Planner, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Facebook is where hypocrisy, falseness, double standards, rumors, and depression meet up for coffee. I have also been told that I am beyond cure. He won’t expect it back. If you post funny, interesting, or informative videos on your Facebook, people will love to share & comment. It’s just that you are fatter and there is more surface area for the sun to hit. I might as well call you Google because you have everything that I am looking for. So how do you stay ahead of the competition and ensure you're sharing amazing, relevant content?
Hacker News is similar to Reddit, but uses a different algorithm to push results onto the front page. If I don’t log into Facebook two days in a row, call the police, someone must’ve kidnapped me! A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it. Outside of the wealth of material you can find by browsing our articles, there are other sites which provide items to enhance your Facebook pages. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. Some articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. Come over to the dark side…we’ve got candy. A broad smile is a cooler way of showing your enemies that you have teeth. Before we dive into the best statuses, let’s go into a bit more detail of how you can write and come up with your very own creative and unique status or post. Some of these may surprise you. It’s okay if you don’t like me. This will just make you look like a bully, and the comments to your status will just be a huge polarizing argument. Most people want to interact with them because everyone enjoys a good laugh. Dear life, When I said, “can my day get any worse?” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge. If they're good, I'll definitely add them! I’d really post your name here every minute if Facebook keeps on asking me what’s on my mind. It’s always darkest before dawn. Remember that anyone’s best work does not come on the first try, it takes some time and patience to come up with really great material that will impress you friends and make them laugh. Always borrow money from a pessimist. When you like a photo, a status update, or a post shared by a friend of yours, your friend who originally made the post is in control of privacy settings. I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones… that’s why it’s called a “cell” phone. HubPages® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc. HubPages and Hubbers (authors) may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others. Content on the website is based on votes from users and Inbound.org's algorithm. Below you will find a compilation of over 100 funny Facebook status from around the web. I’m awesome. But I do have the biggest heart to love you with. I’m really scared, you guys. You’re born free, then you’re taxed to death. Kiss me and you will see how important I am. As long as cocoa beans grow on trees, chocolate is fruit to me. Number one: eat less. I mean, these days it’s easy to have 1,500 friends that you’ve never met before. Here are sites with a huge selection of material: Follow our advice and checkout Life Daily, and these sites we have listed. It’s fun to see what everyone can come up with. Meetings are 20% small talk, 5% what the meeting is about and 75% wasting everyone’s time. Don’t tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon. You have the right to remain silent. Some articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. You don’t have to like me, I’m not a Facebook status. I’m sorry that I’m not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse. Number two: exercise more. Need something cool to say because you just slipped and fell? I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Weather forecast for tonight: Dark with a chance of tomorrow in the morning.
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